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Is Searching for Motivation Holding You Back?

Are you in search of your ‘motivation’?

I came across a little ‘nugget of gold’ yesterday and it’s the difference between being ‘motivated’ and being ‘inspired’ to do something. Being ‘motivated’ may sometimes hold you back and often if means forcing yourself to do something that you don’t really want to do, but you feel you should’ do it.

Let me explain…

Have you ever thought I need to.… lose weight/learn to drive/get fit/go on a diet/get a better job etc.” – maybe you set your New Year Resolution and you start of full of enthusiasm but after a short period, you’re struggling to ‘find the motivation’ to continue – or maybe you just thought about doing something but you never quite got round to starting it.

Then, it plays on the back of your mind and you start telling yourself – “I really should do this” – but then you don’t or you feel like you really need to ‘re-motivate yourself’  but you’re struggling to ‘find your motivation’…

Well you’re definitely not alone and many of us are making the same mistake. When we think we need to find our motivation, we’re often doing ‘it’ – whatever ‘it’ is because we think we ‘should’ and not because it’s actually what we really WANT to do. Sometimes we’re doing ‘it’ because someone else has suggested we ‘should’ – even worse… now we feel de-motivated AND GUILTY!

So what can you do instead?

What we are better doing is looking for the reason(s) that makes us feel ‘inspired’ to do something. When we’re feeling ‘inspired’ then we drive on – even if the going gets tough! We have a BIG reason WHY we WANT to do ‘it’ and ‘it’ becomes so important that it would feel impossible not to continue.

Let me give you an example… Have any of you ever tried and failed to lose some excess weight? I have – for years my weight gradually increased even when I felt I needed to lose weight. I was uncomfortable in my body – I hated going clothes shopping and yet I couldn’t find the ‘motivation’ to stick to a diet. So, as much as I ‘needed’ to lose weight, I clearly didn’t ‘want’ it enough to actually do something about it and stick to it. I was constantly searching for my ‘motivation’ but never quite found it!

UNTIL….

I sat in the Doctor’s surgery and he said:

“You’ve got Type 2 Diabetes, High Blood Pressure and High Cholesterol – you’re already on blood pressure tablets and now you’ll need to take medication for the Diabetes 4 times per day. If you don’t change, you’re going to die!”

My BIG Reason to Change…

And there it was – my BIG REASON WHY… I wanted to LIVE!

I wanted to be able to spend time with my family and create lots of new and happy memories with my husband, children and grandchildren – for me and for them…

Now this was pretty extreme – “stay as you are and die or make a change and live…” My brain shifted in that instant because I saw a very clear vision of myself, lying in a coffin, surrounded by my family. I knew in that moment that I would ‘change’ – and I did!

Although I came away from the Doctors surgery with the ‘prescription’ for the Diabetes medication, I didn’t fill the prescription…

I went home feeling too embarrassed to tell anyone what the Doctor had said and instead of talking about it I set out to research alternative options and found out that I could possibly put the Diabetes into remission by following a low carbohydrate diet which I started immediately and have stuck to for 2 years. Within 3 months, I’d lost 2 stone in weight and the diabetes was reversed to ‘pre-diabetic’ levels.

When we have a clear vision of our WHY and we feel ‘inspired’ rather than ‘motivated’, we stand a much better chance of continuing.

Although this is a fairly extreme ‘inspiration’, it does prove to me that when we create a big enough reason for doing something and we know why we’re doing it, we’re much more likely to keep feeling inspired to continue, if we keep the picture of why we’re doing it in our head. If we’re doing it because we feel we ‘need’ to do it, we’re often working to other people’s values and beliefs rather than our own. We have to work to our own ‘values’ and not other peoples if we want to feel inspired and not just motivated…

I’m slipping back…

I did brilliantly for 2 years- the Doctor was impressed and I’ve managed to keep the weight off and stick to the low carb diet and more importantly I’ve avoided having to take the Metformin Diabetes Prescription!

I thought I’d made the change for life that I’d been inspired to make… until 2 weeks ago. Sadly my dog was taken unexpectedly very poorly and she went to ‘doggy heaven’ a few days ago… and now I’ve fallen straight back into ’emotional eating’ and my low carb diet has flown out of the window.

So as I write this post, it’s for a very important and selfish reason… I’m thinking about me and my reason WHY… I’m re-inspiring and reminding myself of my vision – I know if I continue as I have today that I will be back in the Doctors surgery being handed a ‘death sentence’… So as of this very moment, I’m back on track…

I’ve re-set my goal, re-considered my reason WHY and re-set my mind and now I’ll stick to the change!

We can’t all wait until we receive a death sentence before we find our inspiration to make a change, but, when we know we WANT to make a change then it’s important to take some time to answer the following questions and write down the answers:

  • Write down what you want to achieve
  • Why do you want to achieve it?
  • Who do you want to achieve it for?
  • What’s your number 1 reason for wanting to achieve this?
  • What other reasons are there?
  • What will happen if you do achieve it?
  • What will happen if you don’t achieve it?
  • What won’t happen if you do achieve it?
  • What won’t happen if you don’t achieve it?
  • What’s the picture in your head if you think about you being successful in achieving ‘it’?
  • What’s the picture in your head if you think about lying in your coffin having not achieved ‘it’…
  • Who else will benefit if you achieve it?
  • Who will benefit if you don’t achieve it?
  • How will you benefit if you do achieve it?

If you answer these questions honestly, you should have a much clearer idea of your ‘WHY’ and whether you’re doing this for yourself or for somebody else. If you find you’re doing it because you feel you ‘should’ then you need to go back to the drawing board and find some better reasons that will ‘inspire’ you and not ‘motivate’ you…

If you’re struggling to find your inspiration to change, let me know in the comments box – sometimes a fresh pair of eyes and ears can see the BIG reason when we get stuck in our rut…

If you’ve been struggling with your New Year Resolutions then it’s time to discover your BIG REASON too…

90 Day Challenge – Are you in?

I’m inspiring myself to lose at least 1 stone (14 lb’s) over the next 3 months – if you’re interested in making a change and you want to join me on my 90 day challenge, please let me know and we can help to keep our inspiration flowing together!

Make A Change – 90 Day Challenge

Let’s give it a go together – I’d love to know if you take up the challenge and if so how you get on – post on here to help me and others keep ‘inspired’ to achieve our goals…
What’s your ‘why’ – what would ‘inspire’ rather than ‘motivate’ you to keep on track?

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9 Comments

  1. January 21, 2019 / 7:05 am

    Wendy, I’m glad to hear that you’re back on track. Sometimes it takes a jolt or a real setback to make us realise that we’re slipping and to guide us back onto our path. I love the questions you posed. Lots of food for thought. Hope the ache in your heart is a bit less now. Sending you love and hugs from afar. We’re heading off to the beach for a weeks camping holiday tomorrow. Catch you later my friend. xx

    • Wendy
      Author
      January 21, 2019 / 11:11 pm

      Hi Miri, Great to hear from you! I’ve been full of a cold and feeling very sorry for myself… however, feeling much better today so hopefully on an upward spiral! I hope you have a wonderful camping trip and I look forward to seeing your photos! – very jealous though… ENJOY!!! sending much love and a big hug xxx

      • January 22, 2019 / 3:33 am

        Ooh, a cold doesn’t sound good. Hope you’re well and truly on the mend Wendy. Sending you big warm healing hugs from here. And yes, no doubt I’ll be posting lots of holiday pics, sorry! 😁😜 xx

        • Wendy
          Author
          January 24, 2019 / 7:40 am

          Thanks Miri… Never apologise for having fun and inspiring me with those beautiful photos! They cheer me up even when I don’t get chance to comment on them… I’m feeling tons better so the ‘hug’ worked – thank you! Enjoy the rest of your wonderful holiday and lets catch up on your return… xxx

          • January 24, 2019 / 8:25 pm

            My apology was a bit tongue in cheek Wendy but your words are very sweet. So glad you’re feeling better and yes, let’s definitely catch up properly when I return. xx

          • Wendy
            Author
            January 24, 2019 / 10:47 pm

            Smiling… Have a wonderful day! xx

          • January 25, 2019 / 12:21 am

            You too! xx

    • Wendy
      Author
      January 11, 2019 / 8:06 am

      Thanks Bella – much appreciated.. x

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