It’s the last of my 7 part series and in this final week, it’s time to focus on how to ‘allow’ the Law of Attraction to work it’s magic. If you’ve already created your Vision Board and followed the previous suggestions in this series, then you may already be seeing signs that the Universe is lining up all the ‘ducks in a row’ to make some special deliveries to you. However, if you haven’t noticed any signs and are beginning to feel a bit ‘despondent’ then this it’s time to start challenging yourself about how you think and what your limiting beliefs may be.
Have you noticed the ‘negative committee’ in your head? Saying things like:
“Well I’ve put that I want to start my own business on my Vision Board, but who am I kidding… I can’t really leave my job because I’m too old..” or “I’m unlucky – I never win anything so why do I think I’m going to see extra money coming into my life?” or “I’ll never look like that person on my Vision Board – everyone in my family is overweight… it’s in our genes” etc…..
Or have you had any ‘nay sayers’ making you feel ’embarrassed’ about your Vision Boarding or Law of Attraction journey. Maybe you’ve heard people close to you saying:
“Oh – what a waste of time.. that Law of Attraction is a load of baloney… I tried it once and nothing happened!” or “you’d be better off spending your time doing something else than that rubbish”….
Is that positive feeling and sense of excitement that you initially felt when you created your Vision Board starting to wear a bit thin?
Well what you focus on is what you get… If you’re thinking “Good things like that never happen for people like me…”, you’re absolutely right…
Good things like that are much less likely to appear in your life when you allow the doubts and your ‘limiting beliefs’ to re-establish a pattern of negative thoughts and behaviour, because in order for the Universe to deliver those very special parcels, you have to ‘allow’ them to arrive at your doorstep.
How To Identify Your Limiting Beliefs And Understand How These Impact On The Law Of Attraction…
Often, we’re not even consciously aware that we even have a ‘limiting belief’… what is that anyway you may ask? If you’re not sure what a limiting belief is, check out my previous post Are ‘BELIEFS’ Holding You Back? So how do you know if you’ve established some beliefs about what is possible for you in your life that simply aren’t true, but are limiting your capacity to live the life you dream of?
- When you look at the ‘goals or dreams’ that you’ve added onto your Vision Board, think about each one and notice how it makes you feel and what you say to yourself when you look at the pictures/words each day. You may feel excited about some and yet others, you feel ‘doubtful about or you notice yourself saying ‘well I like the picture but there’s no chance that’ll happen for me’….
If you notice some feeling of negativity about any of the ‘dreams’ you’ve added to your board, it’s likely that there is an underlying ‘limiting belief’ that you’ve established. Often, these beliefs are created in our early childhood or through a negative event or experience we’ve had in our lives. Our beliefs determine how we feel and behave and therefore if we have an underlying ‘negative belief’ associated with one of our dreams, the likelihood of us achieving that dream is diminished.
As an example, I recall my parents saying things like: “Money is the root of all evil” and “Money doesn’t bring you happiness”……
As a child, repeatedly hearing those phrases planted the seed that if money doesn’t bring you happiness, it must make you sad and that if money is the root of evil, then it’s something to avoid having.
Can you see how those early thought processes influenced my beliefs around ‘having money’ in a negative way and as a result, for many years, my associations to receiving ‘money’ were negative? Do you think these beliefs may have had a limiting impact on my life?
You’re right – they did and it was only after many years of working harder and harder, climbing up the Corporate ladder and increasing my salary to a relatively good level and yet still never seeming to have any savings or spare cash and suffering increasing ‘debt’, that I sat down and challenged myself about why I was earning money and yet didn’t feel the benefit myself.
I realised that for many years, I’d been looking after everybody else and pushing money ‘out of my hands’ and into other people’s… I finally realised that if I really wanted to help other people in my life, I needed to ‘help myself’ first… I had to establish new ways of behaving and create new empowering beliefs associated to ‘having money’….
This is just one example from my personal experience where I recognised that the lessons I’d taken on board as a child, were incorrect and needed to change if my ‘adult life’ was not going to continue to be held back by these ‘limiting beliefs’….
If you feel any ‘discomfort’ around the dreams you’ve added to your board then it’s time for you to do a bit of ‘digging and delving’ to discover what your limiting beliefs are too…
We often ‘pick up’ our limiting beliefs through observation of those close to us as we grow up without ever realising it. As children, we don’t understand the hidden meaning in some of the words and phrases we hear, we only pick up on the ‘face value’ of those words… We believe literally what we hear. Maybe someone has gone through a difficult relationship breakdown and we overhear a conversation where they say: “All men are horrible.. I’m never going to have another relationship – it’s better to be on our own”… now that conversation was probably spoken in the heat of the moment and yet when we overhear those words as a child, it could plant a ‘seed’ that grows and we start looking for further evidence that what we heard is true..
If you’re suffering repeated relationship breakdowns, then perhaps you have developed some unconscious limiting beliefs around relationships and without you even realising it, your behaviour is ‘pushing people away’ or you feel afraid of commitment etc… Maybe you believe you’ll never find ‘love’ or that you’re not ‘worthy of being loved’…. It may therefore be time to start questioning yourself as to why you feel that way.
Other things you may notice yourself doing which show that you may have some limiting beliefs that you need to change are:
- Making excuses or procrastinating – putting things off even when you feel that you ‘should’ do them…
- Repeatedly complaining about things that are ‘going wrong’ in your life either to yourself or other people.
- When you come out with those ‘generalist’ statements – All people are.. I never …. It’s always impossible for me because….
- When you constantly put yourself down… I’m not good enough… I’m rubbish at … I’m not loveable… I’m not clever enough … I’m too fat… too thin… etc.
- When you talk about your fears.. e.g. I’m frightened if I do … that ?? will happen… If I leave (my job/relationship/country/home), my world will collapse/people will hate me/my family will disown me… I’m frightened to commit to a relationship in case they leave me etc.
- Feeling that you have to be perfect and putting things off because you feel you aren’t. e.g. I can’t change jobs because I don’t know …. well enough or I haven’t completed the training yet etc.
- Not trying something new because you fear making a mistake
When you ask yourself some of these questions in relation to the dreams you’ve added to your Vision Board and you notice some repeated thought patterns that are ‘negative’, start digging a little deeper. Look back for examples in your earlier life that may have created this way of thinking and then it’s time to start CHALLENGING those beliefs.
Here are some examples of great questions to ask yourself, which can be adapted to suit your specific ‘limiting belief’:
- Notice the voice in your head – is it ‘generalising’ e.g. ‘ALL men/women are bad’ or “I NEVER receive money” – If you are repeating ‘generalised’ and ‘global’ statements to yourself, you have to ask yourself a question to break this ‘generalisation’ down.
- In the examples I’ve given, I could ask:
- “Have I ever met a man/woman’ who wasn’t bad… who was kind and made me feel good”
- “Are there men/women in the news who’ve done great things – kind things to help others?
- “Have I ever received payment for work I’ve done?
- Have I ever had any money to buy food/pay bills etc.?
- Did I ever receive pocket-money as a child or money for birthdays/Xmas or from an unexpected source?”
- In the examples I’ve given, I could ask:
Asking these ‘challenge’ questions and writing down the answers will start to dispel the original ‘generalised belief’ e.g. that ‘All’ men/women were bad or the ‘you ‘never’ receive money and your mind will start to open to the possibility of a different more positive belief and association instead.
- You can now start to reinforce the possibility that you may have been ‘wrong’ and that there is a different perspective, by pro-actively looking for evidence to support how you would like to feel or think.
The internet is a great source of information (as we all know.. where would we be without Google search!!) – put it to positive use and start to gather the evidence that is available to support the way you ‘want to think’ rather than the way you ‘did think’…
In my example relating to ALL Men/Women being bad, this would include researching some ‘amazing men or women’ that have done great things for their communities or their families and friends. Look out for some ‘heroes’ and remind yourself that there are good men and women out there – they aren’t all bad… This breaks down the original ‘generalised belief’…
Start to Challenge yourself within your daily life and start to look at things from a different perspective… Make notes of any ‘evidence’ you come across that supports your new way of thinking.
Write down WHY you want what you’ve added to your Vision Board – what difference would this make to your life? Associate with the Vision by writing down a statement about how this would make you feel and a list of all the positive benefits this would give you and then write down an empowering ‘allowing statement’ (see examples below). Put this statement in a box and get it out at least once per week (preferably daily) to remind and reinforce a better way of thinking. This will help to establish new ways of thinking, feeling and empower you…
Examples of ‘Allowing Statements’ include:
- I’m in the process of attracting amazing people into my life
- I’m in the process of pursuing my ideal career
- I’m in the process of creating a healthy body
- I’m in the process of becoming an entrepeneur
- I’ve decided I’m going to have more money to enjoy in my life
- I’ve decided I’m going to travel the World or visit a specific destination…
- I’ve decided I’m going to have wonderful friendships
Have you experienced a time in your life when things have changed quickly? The following ‘allowing statements’ encourage you to believe that it’s possible to expect changes to happen more quickly. Why wait until tomorrow when change could start today?
- Can lots of things change for the better in the next few days/weeks/month?
Other useful questions to use to challenge ‘old beliefs’ are:
- Is something holding me back and blocking me from moving forward – what’s getting in the way?
- What excuses am I making to myself or to other people? If I am making excuses, why am I making these and can I consider a way of trying to do something or learning how to do something rather than saying I can’t because…
- If I think something is going to be too hard, ask myself ‘How Can I do that?’
- Am I expecting others to do the work and provide the answers for me?
- Am I worried I may fail? – If so, what would be the worst case scenario if I did and how could I minimise the impact of that?
- What kind of things am I complaining about or blaming other people for? How could I start to take responsibility for my own decisions in life?
- What expectations do I have about the things that ‘should’ happen and is there a gap between what I want to happen and what I think ‘should’ happen because of what others may think?
- What is my ‘set point’ – are my standards too low for what I want to achieve for myself. Or maybe I’ve set my goal to so much higher than my current ‘set point’ that it feels unrealistic. If so, break it down into smaller chunks.
- Do I have any values that are in conflict with my goals? 4 Ways to Develop your Personal Values List and help you to Lead A Life Worth Living!
- Am I doing this because I really want to or because I think I ‘should’.. Who am I doing this for?
After you answer these questions, you will have a better idea about what your limiting beliefs really are and then you can start to form a ‘challenge plan’..
Write down each ‘limiting belief’ and ask:
- How might I be wrong?
- How could I think differently in a way that’s aligned to the goal that I want to achieve?
- What evidence can I find in the ‘wider world’ that casts doubt on my original limiting belief and shows me that there are people who have been successful in overcoming their beliefs and creating new ones?
Write down your answers and over the next few days keep thinking about these questions and adding any other ways of thinking to your list.
Do your research on the internet and within your local community – search for the positive examples and write down the evidence you discover or print off the articles etc.
Now your mind has started to align with your goals and is creating new patterns, new neural pathways and as a result your behaviour and actions will also start to change. You will then be emitting a ‘positive vibration’ and opening up the ‘airwaves’ for the Law of Attraction to deliver…
If you’ve carried a ‘limiting belief’ with you for a long time, it’s important to reinforcing the new way of thinking, in order to avoid slipping back into those old patterns of thinking.
Create An ‘Attraction Box’
I like to have an “Attraction Box” – I first saw this idea in Michael Losier’s Book: “The Law of Attraction – The Secret Behind The Secret” and I use a box that I find visually attractive and that appeals to my visual senses and makes me feel good when I look at it.. or You can decorate a box so that it is appealing to you as well.
In my Attraction Box, I keep my gratitude journal and any ‘positive visual’ cuttings and statements that I’ve printed as evidence that my ‘old limiting belief’ was incorrect and I include my ‘allowing statements. I keep the box at the side of my bed so I can have a regular look through the box as an ongoing reminder.
It works when I do it and it doesn’t work when I don’t… so if I can encourage you to take the steps that I’ve suggested through this 7 week series, I am confident from my own experience that this can work for you too.
If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always had!
So if what you’ve been doing so far isn’t getting you the results you want and deserve then it’s time to try something new…
Good luck with your journey and I look forward to you letting me know all about your amazing successes over the coming months.
If you’ve enjoyed this series, it would be great if you could Subscribe by adding your email into the subscribe box at the side of this post or on my ‘home’ page. I’ve recently transferred from WordPress.com to a self hosted site and I’m not sure how much longer the WP reader will continue to work and it would be great to keep in touch.
May Your Dreams Come True….
The World is Your Oyster…
Look out for your Pearls arriving!
AND last but not least…..
Hi Wendy I love your ideas. Haven’t heard the one about looking at the images on the vision board and noticing how it makes you feel to discover your limitations. I’m just getting ready to make a new vision board and will use this technique. Thanks!
Brilliant! Thanks for checking out the series Lorna and enjoy updating your vision board… let me know how it goes.. May your dreams come true xx
Thank you for being you 🙂
Thank you I appreciate your comment!
“Limiting beliefs.” How DID they get so snarky? Good grief! They need to back off. 😉 I love this series and I’ve read bits and pieces (although a bit overwhelmed lately trying to keep up with it all). I LOVE your glowing positivity. You shine! Hope you are having a great week. <3 Hugs.
Aww – thanks so much Karen.. I really appreciate your beautifully positive and encouraging comment! What a lovely end to my day – thank you!! I’ve had a good week Karen. I’ve just set up a 2nd blog – bullyingmanager.com which has been setup as self hosted today and I’ve literally just posted first blog post (I’m still developing the site though).. I’m hoping it will provide information to support those affected by bullying at work.. I hope you’re having a brilliant week too xxx
Yes, I’ve been watching and hoping all if falling into place for you, my friend. I am anxious to read about this new subject. You know I can relate (and if I can help, let me know). Hugs to you. <3
Hi Karen, Taking the leap of faith to leave work a few months ago has definitely been the right decision.. I felt a weight lift from my shoulders that had been holding me back and now I’m enjoying letting life unfold in a very different way and I’m definitely ‘listening to my heart’. I hope you can find a nugget or 2 of inspiration in the new ‘Confidence’ series… I’ve also just set up a new blog: https://www.bullyingmanager.com – It’s in very early stages with only a couple of blog posts and I’m hoping I can build on this to help anyone else who’s suffered from bullying at work.. Many hugs returned Karen xxx
Letting life unfold, perhaps at a much slower pace, is exactly what I need and exactly what I’ve been fighting. Odd, really. 🙂 I love that you have found a new path and that you are enjoying it so much. It oozes from your posts. It makes others smile. I’ll check out your new site. Keep on keepin’ on. <3
Fantastic work Wendy. What a lot of time, effort and energy you have put into this and your examples and recommendations and suggestions are spot on. Thanks for the many helpful reminders and hints. I have a Magical Creation Box, similar to your Attraction box, it gives me goosebumps each time I put something in it. I need to catch up on your previous posts and look forward to doing so! xo
Brilliant – thanks Deb I appreciate your lovely feedback! Yes – I know the ‘goosebump’ feeling.. wow! I hope you enjoy the rest of the series. It’s great to hear from you Deb -thanks xx
Brilliant as ever Wendy! I have loved every one of the posts in this series. They have all come with the right message at the right time. I will definitely be looking at my limiting beliefs over the next few days as I know they are holding me back. I am so pleased for you that your dreams are starting to manifest in such a big way. Your new site is amazing and is definitely giving me some food for thought about going self hosted in the future. Wishing you every success as always, Catherine xx
Fantastic Catherine – I’m delighted you’ve been able to take a positive action message away from this series… and I’m sure you will see some ‘Universal deliveries’ very soon yourself… you get back what you give out and your definitely giving out that positive vibration! I can’t wait to hear how you get on… xxxx
A wonderful conclusion to your LOA series Wendy, though of course it’s really only the beginning because you’ve given us so much information to take away and apply. For me personally you’ve inspired me and given me much food for thought, at a time when I’ve really needed it so I thank you for that my lovely friend. Lots of things to put into practice as I move forward. Love and hugs to you xo
Thanks so much Miriam… yes, it does take some consistent effort and action and I’ll be popping lots of reminders on over the coming months too.. Maybe a monthly LOA post as a follow up to the series. I’m so glad you’ve found some positive action steps to continue with along your journey… xxx
I have indeed. Look forward to any follow up posts Wendy.
Thank you Wendy. I have really enjoyed this series. A few ideas for moving forward…xx
Brilliant – thanks Brigid.. I’m glad you enjoyed the series and have managed to find something in there to take forward! Fab xx
Thank you – I’m really pleased you enjoyed this post.. and hope you got chance to check out the rest of the series too. Much appreciated xx
I would Love to.
Brilliant – thank you! x
ps -to subscribe you just need to add your name and email address to the Subscribe box in the right hand sidebar.. Thank you xx
thank you so much